The phrase new normal kept popping up in news articles lately. There was something about it that I didn’t like, but it wasn’t clear to me before coffee. Then it hit me, after coffee, of course. The articles were focused on the rise of violence in our time. We have terrorists abroad murdering people over what is…
Category: personal safety
Five Tips to De-Stress in Stressful Times
In our time it is easy to get distracted and lose sight of he facts. Fear mongers on both sides of every issue spin every minutia possible into something to support their claims. As a self-defense instructor it is bad for business for me to openly state that you are safer than you think. There…
On Defense
If we listen to the news or spend too much time reading social media “newsfeeds”, we are hit with wave after wave of emotionally charged propaganda (and this is true regardless of which side of any particular issue you stand). I want to take a moment here and look directly and honestly at one issue…
Define “Enemy”
A large part of personal safety is going to be found in reducing conflict. Put simply, if you are a hothead, you are going to find a lot of conflict in your life. You might justify it. He made me mad is a sentence that has a lot of poorly examined ghosts in it. But how often…
Feedback on Texas Hold’em Self Defense
I received an email and share with permission here. Mr. Smedley, I recently finished reading your book “Texas Hold’em Self Defense”. I want to say first, I really enjoyed the read. Your writing style is different; easy-going and laid back. Your sense of humor comes out here and there and I can easily…
If I Could Give Only One Piece of Advice…
My one piece of advice would be that you can take charge of your own safety. You are in control of where and how you spend your time, as well as who you spend your time with. These factors are under your control, and play a tremendous role in your safety. Exercise that control. I…
The Kindness of Strangers
Many people tend to follow the assumption that people will come to their aid in the event they are involved in a violent confrontation. I don’t want to sound like a pessimist here, I will grant that there are good people out there, great people even. There are many people who would never even think…
Let’s Talk About Responsibility
In a recent news story, a 17 year old was burglarizing a home when the owner shot and killed him. Family members of the deceased stated that he didn’t didn’t deserve to die and asked something along the lines of how was he supposed to get his money. Obviously, loss of life is a thing…
Being Bullied? Do’s and Dont’s
In this article I want to take a moment and speak directly to the people who might be getting bullied. Having been through this myself, I want to offer some insight and hopefully this can be of some help to those in this situation. Don’t: Don’t assume you have no friends. When I went through…
When They Are Just Venting
There are times when a heated verbal tirade becomes a physical conflict, and in many cases, or probably most cases, it becomes so without any necessity. If you are in your right mind, then you will be able to see that sometimes people are just blowing off steam. I myself am guilty of needing to vent…
Don’t Make it Worse
Fumes are flammable. Be careful. The first, and probably most important step in preventing a moment of conflict from becoming physical violence is understanding the basic rule – Don’t make it worse. While this may seem at first glance as a no-brainer, there are mental processes that make this a lot harder than it appears…
The Paranoia Straw-Man
Within the study of logic and critical thinking, one will find many items labeled Logical Fallacies. In this post I am going to look at a particular logical fallacy called the straw-man and how it is quite often used against those who try to teach people to be safe. The fallacy of the straw-man is really pretty simple, and…
Silent Communication
The subject of what precisely it is that makes a criminal go, “Nah…not that one. I need to find a different one.” as they seek out a target is something that has been an ongoing topic of interest for me. With my size (6’5″ and 255 lbs.), I tend to be dropped from the interview process pretty early on….
Peer Pressure
I teach martial arts as an alternate PE credit elective inside of a public school in a financially challenged area of North Texas. There is a new student who has been nearly late every single day since transferring into my class. Once inside the classroom, he is attentive, hard working and clearly eager to learn….
When there are no “good options”
This article is based on a conversation I had with a friend of mine. It was pointed out to me during this chat that I spend a lot of time writing about how to avoid conflict, how to not participate and how our ego gets us in trouble, but do not tend to address those…
Calm Down
There has been a steady increase in physical violence that really seems to match the inflamed rhetoric from the digital media/social media. In order to begin to understand the problem, we should take a close look at the factors involved and then we can begin to chart a course to a solution. This is not…
Social Media and Strange Behavior
Social media has created some really strange, and probably very damaging new human habits. One cannot even go through what were once simple and enjoyable parts of a day without being distracted, or seeing other people distracted. In this article I am going to look at some of these new habits and look at them…
Wallace Smedley 